Obituary of Ruth May Butkus

Ruth May (Pavluvcik) Butkus, beloved wife of Joseph Butkus for nearly 67 years, mother, grandmother and great-grandmother, passed away peacefully at home surrounded by her loving family on Wednesday, June 10, 2026.  She was 93.

Ruth was born and raised in Stratford, CT.  After graduating from Stratford High School in 1950, she spent many years as the top (and favorite) Slovak speaking bank teller at The Connecticut National Bank.  Ruth was a devout Catholic.  She took pride in being chosen as "May Queen" for the "Crowning of the Blessed Mother" in 1954 for her then parish, Holy Name of Jesus in Stratford,  

Ruth and Joe met on a blind date in January of 1959 and were married on November 7th that same year.  Soon after, they raised four children in a happy and loving home in Trumbull, CT handbuilt by Joe nights and weekends over 20 months.  Ruth lived in that same beautiful home until she passed.  

Ruth was the heart of her home and the matriarch of the family, always keeping everyone together.  She loved baking and cooking and was known for her entertaining.  Many of her coveted, favorite family recipes were published in the Connecticut Post.

A favorite annual event was her famous Christmas Cookie Exchange party, which spanned over 25 years.  The games planned, food served, grab bag gifts and door prizes always meant a full house of ladies!  Ruth's generosity extended beyond the party by collecting non-perishable items for Caroline House in Bridgeport, serving those less fortunate.  All were happy to contribute.  Ruth's party ushered in the Christmas season each year.

Ruth was talented and crafty, finding joy in the many projects as intricate as hollow sugar decorated Easter Eggs and making her famous chocolates which served as wedding favors around the globe, as well as themed holiday treats.  Her homemade peanut butter cups were a favorite of many.

She loved to travel and was intrigued by Europe when she visited as a young woman with her dear Aunt and Uncle.  This love took her from St. Petersburg to Sydney and diverse places in between.  Though the international trips were wonderful, Ruth also loved the low key, rustic charm of Vermont, spending countless weekends with her family camping on "The Property" in Brookline.  In later years, she enjoyed the warmth (and indoor plumbing) of a cozy inn located in the same town.

For 17 years, Ruth accompanied her husband, Joe, a Korean War Army veteran, to his annual military reunions held in various locations across the U.S, and hosted two in New England.  She became known as the "Goody (swag) Bag Lady" - providing welcome bags chocked full of donated items she solicited from local businesses and adding her own goodies of snacks to be enjoyed "back in the hotel rooms".  Ruth's generosity was unmeasured.  The friendships made at those reunions were priceless.

Ruth had a great sense of humor and delighted in being compared to the Queen Mother (Elizabeth) as they looked like they "could be sisters".  She perfected the Queen's gloved wave.  Her wit was quick and her smile infectious.  

Family was everything to Ruth.  Her role as wife, mother, grandmother and great-grandmother (sister, aunt, cousin, friend) was her proudest role.  All were welcomed.  All were loved.  

Slowing down over the past few years due to health issues bothered her the most.  She loved to Do, Make, Go (shopping)!  She rarely complained.  Such grace!  She and her family were blessed with her beautiful long life.  

She will be greatly missed.

Ruth is survived by her loving husband Joseph Butkus, son John (Jack) Butkus (Cindy), Mary Ellen Butkus, JoAnn Lodice and Paul Butkus (Dr. Carolina Flores), her cherished grandchildren, adored great grandchildren, Sister-in-law Agnes Farkas (Leonard) and Sister-in-law Marcia Pavluvcik.  She was predeceased by her parents Joseph and Mae Pavluvcik and her brother Arthur J. Pavluvcik.

The family would like to thank Ruth's wonderful caregivers who treated her like family as well as her team of nurses, doctors, therapists and volunteers with Yale New Haven Home Hospice.  

A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated on Wednesday, June 17, 2026 at 10:00 a.m. in St. Theresa Church, 5301 Main St., Trumbull.  Interment will follow in Oaklawn Cemetery, Fairfield.  Friends may greet the family on Tuesday from 4:00 to 7:00 p.m. in the Abriola Parkview Funeral Home, 419 White Plains Rd., Trumbull.

To leave an online condolence, please visit us at www.abriola.com.